I came across this fun feature from Amazon Kindle that allows you see which parts of your book people highlight the most. Not surprisingly, most of my highlights were from Internet Dating Is Not Like Ordering a Pizza. I wrote that book as a guide that would help people craft an online dating profile that would sound like them and get the results they wanted (which is to have likeminded people contact them.) I was thrilled to see that people were highlighting some of the sections.
For example, one commonly highlighted phrase was:
People are visual creatures by nature, so you can’t just tell us about something. You’ve got to show us.
This is a reminder that an online dating profile needs to be descriptive. It’s not enough to list things (I like to run, watch basketball games, etc.) you have to describe why you like them in order to show someone your personality.
Perhaps that’s why this phrase was highlighted frequently:
If you like to read, say something like: “I love reading and get into a variety of fiction works. Some of the latest books I’ve read were The Biography of Jane Doe, How to Become a Millionaire, and Harry Potter. (I guess if you write a book like Harry Potter you will become a millionaire.)”
I gave a lot of examples on how to show and not tell when it came to an online dating profile, and I was happy to see people were taking note.
Another popular phrase:
“write as if you are talking to someone and telling them face-to-face what kind of person you’d like to meet.”
Does this seem like common sense to you? It should, but if you read most online dating profiles they write like they are trying to show off their vocabulary instead of their personality. You don’t need to be a big-time writer in order to get your profile in shape, but you do need to write in a way that allows people to picture you out on a date with them. Let them see your funny side and your genuineness.
As this commonly highlighted phrase says:
The key to a great essay is making it describe you. Not just listing things about you, but writing in a way that will allow potential dates to envision you going about your daily life.
Another popular phrase was one about letting people down easy. That’s so tough in the dating world, isn’t it? It’s hard to tell someone you don’t think they are right for you. This phrase was highlighted often:
“I really enjoyed meeting you. But I don’t believe we have that much in common. I think you’re a terrific person and I hope you find your match.”
This is a common response you can give to someone you met once for that all-important coffee date. You haven’t gone out on a real date yet, but you don’t know how to tell them it won’t work. This phrase will help you let them down in a kind way.
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